What happens when you think you are have built a great connection with someone and then Boom💥 they disappear.
What is the first thing you think to say or do? 🤯
Hmm, 🤔 should I call, text, visit …..social media. 📱
While some decide to ponder and chase; others decide to accept the situation for what it is and move forward. In my opinion the latter option is always best, accepting that you have been ghosted and moving forward with your life.
Yes, there can be several reasons why you have been ghosted, but the five main reasons always happen to be:
- The one who ghosts is too afraid 🤥 to reveal what truly bothers them about the relationship so instead of communicating they activate their inner deception mode and they take the first flight to ghost town. ✈️
- Another person is now present 🙋♀️ – this person can be new or someone from their past. This person has pulled their attention away from you (of course a ghost doesn’t know how to multi -task 🤦♂️ ).
- You are an option and not a priority !💔 Obviously, you are not supposed to know this at the time (though I am sure this fact was evident through their actions). This is the unsure person, the one that creates a facade and wants to avoid giving closure at all costs. Usually because they are selfish and want to have the option to return in the event that they do not find better or realise that there isn’t greener pastures on the other side.
- Mental illness; such as a bout of depression but this is excuse is somewhat rare.
- Last but not least – Boredom 😐 : the ghost just needed something to bide their time (who cares why) but this person is usually waiting on a specific person or thing to return back into their lives. Until then you are their entertainment. ⏳
Now do not get me wrong if someone is disturbing your peace and you feel the only way out is to cut out and ghost, then do as you please…. but that is whole another situation which we can discuss at a later stage.
It is certainly funny how the person who ghosts always seems to have shown some aspect of immaturity as you were getting to know them but I am sure you let that slide and continued to invest (I hope that wasn’t a trigger 🙊).
Fear, weakness, triggered failures and insecurities – all things which leads a ghost to cut out and leave without any form of discussion or explanation.
I know it can be hard to believe or accept especially when you have built a genuine connection and as much as I am sure that you had; trust me dolls & gents when I say that you should see it as a blessing in disguise. Try and see it that God was preventing you from jumping on a roller coaster 🎢 of unnecessary emotions 🌋
Do you really want the type of person who is flight risk to return; feed you with sorry ass excuses; and have you questioning the relationship and/or yourself constantly. There is no peace or justice in that and you deserve better! In my humble opinion you would only be settling and as a empress or emperor 👸🏾 🤴🏾 settling should not even be part of your vocabulary.
For some reason, I felt called to address option 3 above –
The ghost who is conflicted as to whether you have true future potential to be the one or just potential; these are the ones who inadvertently see you as a priority and (sorry to say) 🤷♂️ not important. They basically disappear with the intention of leaving things open for an easy return. Yes, I am sure we have all been visited by this type of ghost at least once in our lifetime.
“Ghosting is the Closure”
When this type of ghost makes attempts to return – dolls and gents close that door firmly 🚪 , lock it 🔐 and throw that key 🔑 down a drain . I know some of you are thinking – but what about “closure”. Please, please I encourage you to obtain forgiveness, “closure” and healing within yourselves. What exactly can they supply you with that will satisfy your ego that you cannot do to yourself? There was no true value there initially so what has changed now? Why should you even care? It is not like they care…
Remember once that person displays acts of abandonment, they foolishly reveal that they are truly a ghost (and possibly a deceptive one at that). They are no more! You were fine before engaging with them and you will be fine after. If you like you can give that ghost a name, but do not create a path of easy access back into your life (unless you truly believe through your intuition that they have worked really hard to be revived),
as you will only just BLOCK your BLESSINGS and that great ABUNDANCE that is waiting to make an entrance into your life.
Make a constant effort to acknowledge those that treat you as a priority and not an option. However, if it is a situation where you equally view each other as options then yes do you but if not keep it moving and look forward. Better is to come!
Some advice -“Invest in someone based on how much they invest in you.” (Mirror behaviour)
Dr Phill
God Bless Dolls & Gents!!
“Do Not Burn Daylight Chasing The Wrong One. The Right One Will Not Run”
Her Confessions 